Electric Chicken's HALL OF FAME

Compiled by Kin Wicked of MaunderSoft


Unlike the guestbook, the entries here will appear chronologically down the page. The Subjects entries will appear in white, and relevant comments from other users will appear in yellow. Any annotations will appear in red though you may want to skip some of those parts if you don't want my biased outlook.

Last Updated: 12/09/02


The Ward:

The Ward is a prime example of the elitist Mac user. Here you will experience the degeneration from a series of rather uninteresting propaganda to an all-out tantrum. You will see how he bids for attention using the methods that he deplores and which finally results in him trying to spoil everyone's enjoyment of the guestbook with a pathetic act of vandalism.




Name: TheWard
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 13.32 - 7/6

Macs do have a purpose and PCs do have a purpuse. Why can't people see this. If someone wants to use a PC to type a letter or play games that fine. Yes Macs are more expensive, but isn't a Mercedes more expensive than a Kia?


Name: TheWard
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 13.33 - 7/6

Yes I see my typo PC Anti-Mac weenies.

Though he started off seemingly pleasantly, after much argument between visitors that has become the nature of the guestbook, the following happened:

Name: iWithholdmyidentity©
Sent: 11.17 - 11/6

"OS X and lightwave................and Maya" ...and the standard setting 3DS Max? What you would want to create 3d models on a mac for is beyond me anyway - surely not for a realtime use?

"all of the essentials built right in. USB. FireWire (IEEE 1394). Ethernet. Modem " ...as you can with a modern PC motherboard at a fraction of the cost.

"mere child's play" ...self explanitary - be a grown up.

"and applications can't conflict with the OS or one another" *when tested with Photoshop, the only software that justifies getting one in the first place

"You get what you pay for friggin goones!" ...yeah - apple's marketing costs.

"And with QuickTime 6, we just upped the ante." ...to just below par compared to DivX playback / compression.

Name: Chicken
Sent: 11.38 - 11/6

HAHAH! Thanks Pau......er, I mean iWithholdmyidentity©...


PS. To the guy who simply copied and pasted huge chunks of propaganda out of Apple's own website, please stop it. M'kay?

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 13.43 - 11/6

You are all a bunch of little kids argueing over what toys you like to use. Get over it. If you like Mac, use it. If you like PC, use it.

When you guys go back and forth spitting your tongues out at each other saying mine is better than yours it is so childish. Get a life. Use what you want and shut up.

You are being very immature.

How utterly grown up of him, don't you think? Strike one for dispelling the myth that Mac users have a elitist complex!

Name: Your mom
Hometown: Florida
Sent: 15.34 - 11/6

ahahahaha my pc is better then any damn mac there is
2.4 ghz
1 gig of RDRAM
128MB GeForce4 Ti-4600
533Mhz FSB
I got 6 usb ports, 3 are 2.0 and other 3 are 1.0
4 Firewires
19 inch lcd flat panel monitor
A ethernet at no extra charge
and u wanna brag bout a mac with alot of integrated bull shit thats slow and cant upgrade and as for reliable OS, windows works fine.. actually i havnt got 1 lil error yet and i can run any game and any application faster then any mac. i dont care but i love my pc but if u like mac then good be a mac user.

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 16.00 - 11/6

Well let me try then...

Dual 1 Ghz G4
128MB GeForce4
60 GB 7200 RPM Internal storage
60 GB 7200 RPM Firewire Drive
DVD Burner (No Extra Charge)
CD Burner (No Extra Charge)
DVD Player (No Extra Charge)
Firewire (Which Apple Invented)
USB (Which Apple made the industry standard)
22 Cinema Flat Panel Display
Ethernet (No extra charge since the PowerMac has come out, about 10 years)
Mac OS X (Otherwise known as UNIX)
iPod (Firewire MP3 Player and hard drive)
Cordless Optical 2 button scroll mouse
Wireless Fastaccess Internet Connection
The best damn software for making and burning DVD's and Audio CD's. The best MP3 software every made, the easiest and quickest photo management software around, the ability to search a dozen search engines at the same time and not open a browser, and then rank them by revelance, and oh ya, thats all for free too.

Anyone else?

The Ward shows us here how to be mature. After all "When you guys go back and forth spitting your tongues out at each other saying mine is better than yours it is so childish." Hmmm!

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 16.02 - 11/6

Oh ya, forgot to mention my 10/100/1000BASE-T Ethernet, not 10/100 (That was free too)

Name: Chicken
Sent: 16.31 - 11/6

The Ward. You make me laugh. First you harp on about how everyone in this guestbbook are a bunch of bickering little kids, then two entries later you go right ahead and boast about your machine's specs!lol!

Furthermore, out of the components you listed that make up your G4, you proudly claim that half of them are free of charge! HAHAH! Please use your brain. Apple machine cost over twice as much as a PC anyway!

Why do you think the G4 with a Superdrive included is more expensive than one without? Oh, let's think about it...

And I like how you list the CD burner, DVD player and DVD burner as three seperate items. lol!


Name: Kin Wicked
Hometown: Northants UK
Sent: 17.50 - 11/6

Some words to the wise:
Ward likes to point out that Apple invented firewire and usb. Who give a flying-chimps-butt-cheek? You may have noticed in all things computer, there's a mathematical progression to technological advances. It was only a matter of time, fart-knocker!

This entry of my own continues but is not relevant to The Ward...

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 17.54 - 11/6

Mr. Chicken,

I do realize that the Mac is more expensive. And yes I did list each function of the SuperDrive, because most people, more than likely, would not know what a SuperDrive is. And yes people are acting like kids here. I was not. I simply stated what my machine had. Thats far from cursing and telling PC users that they are stupid and have inferiour machines.

I'm a Mac user that couldn't care less what someone uses. If you like PC, use it. I myself grew up on PCs and was Anti-Mac for over 10 years. Then I closed my damn mouth, actually used a Mac and figured out how it worked!!!! There's a concept. I didn't listen to what others were saying, I justed used it to get some work done. Ya know what. It was easy... very easy. I spent far less time getting EVERYTHING done. I never had to mess with the system either. I found Apple's OS to be much more intuitive, it made sense and I had fewer steps to do to get the same job done. PC users look at their 2.2 Ghz processors, which are fast and thats it. If you actually sat down with someone that uses a Mac, or used it well yourself you would realize that all the time saving features and ease of use make my work go much easier and faster.

Like I said I was a PC guy, I actuall shut up and used a MODERN Mac. Most of the PC users that complain about Mac and say that they have used it have only used Macs that are 10-15 years old and that they used in high school. The Mac is easier, plain and simple. And this makes if faster than any PC user could understand.

Apples software is also much easier, intutitive and sophisicated. I'm not talking about software that is 10 years old. I'm talking about what NOW ships on Macs. For instance I have an App called iDVD. I can create a custom DVD with video or still menus, audio and much more in less than 5 minutes. Thats from opening the App, to burning a professional DVD that will play in any home entertainment center. Its a beautiful thing that you PC user can't seem to grasp. I used to be one of you, so I know. I know PCs in and out, and Macs as well. I've simply decided to use the machine that is better.

If you want your PC use it, go buy the fastest one you can. No matter how fast PC's get, I'll never switch. Its not about specs, its about over all experience. If you actually use a Mac, you WILL understand. And try to use it for more than 5 minutes at CompUSA before you create another uneducated opinion. Because that is what it is, an UNeducated opinion.

Elitist? Let's see, what has he done for the 'myth' so far?.........oh dear! Infact The Ward had made the same mistake that many others have made, and that is to assume that The Electric Chicken hasn't used a Mac. The truth of the matter is that he uses them almost everyday at work. A composition like the iToilet doesn't just come from nowhere, you know! You need to have attained a level of true hatred for something before you can parody it with such wonderful vigour and venom!

The Ward also gave us a wonderful contradiction here. First he says that he opened his eyes and stopped whinging about Macs long enough to try one, and now he's hooked, and then he says that whatever improvements are made to the PC or Windows, it will note encourage him to swap back. The Ward has not simply chosen what is best for him, he's just swung from one camp to another and is just as stubborn and unyielding as before!

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 18.11 - 11/6

Kin Wicked,

Yes I did point out that Apple invented Firewire, they didn't invent USB though. You are just jumping to your own UNEDUCATED decsions, like most do. I pointed out that Apple invented Firewire and made USB mainstream for a reason. But you look right by that reason and start blabbing about nothing to get your other PC buddies to chuckle and giggle over something you don't know about.

If apple had not invented Firewire where would digital video be? It would still cost so much money you wouldn't be able to use pure digital video at home with your PC. Handheld digital cams would be no where close to where they are today. You are saving money today, because of Apples desire to push the market forward. Because if they don't know one will. PC users would just try to make things cheaper, not better. I want better. And no like I said Apple didn't invent USB. I said they made it mainstream. When Apple released its first iMac they used USB, which was on a few PCs at the time. Apple saw a connection that was over 1000% faster than any other peripherial connector that Macs OR PCs used. So Apple went to hardware developers and told them that if they start making their products with USB, the only thing they would have to do is write a small software driver to sell their product to the Mac users as well as the PC market. And because of this your section of keyboards, mice, joysticks and more is greater, even on the PC side, and easier to connect and much faster as well. All because of the company that you all trash. Apple.

I'll never be able to make anyone here like Mac, I'm sure of that. I just urge everone here to not be so bios because of what a couple high school or college kids write in places like this. If Apples products were as bad as you make them out to be they wouldn't be around. Apple is the inovator, and the PC market and they Clone. They copy Apples ideas... but of course you will disagree with me. Thats just what PC users do, disagree with Mac users.

Starting to sound like Mac propaganda? Why do you suppose that is?

Name: Edg
Sent: 18.32 - 11/6

What HAD you been smoking???!!! HAve you seen what is on top of the UNIX core?? That bieng apples own software? If you had you wouldn't be bitching about apple software, it's renound for being some of the most powerful and intuitive software in the world. Are you a programmer? Are you a systems eng.? If you were you might actually see past the "Win or bin" mentality you seem to support, I mean come on, give something else a try, live a little. I user both Macs and PCs on a regular basis, but which do I buy? Mac's. I could buy a PC for home, but I don't. I could buy a PC for work, but I don't - Apple does it, and in style. Do us all a favour and go to PC World and check it out, rather than whining on a subject you appear (Take note of the appear) to have very little information on.

Take Care,


P.S. Ever been hit by a virus? Ask a mac guy that same question, and notice the difference.

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 18.41 - 11/6

Hi edg,

Nice to see you stopped by. Excellent point about the virus problem... or lack of on a Mac. I've never even heard of any Mac user I know getting ANY sort of virus. And when I get emails from my PC friends warning about nasty viruses floating around I just let out a soft chuckle. I have a Mac, I'm immune.


Kiss Ass!

Incidentally - the issue of Mac users immunity was quelled in a much later page after the eventual cessation of The Ward

Name: Macintrash
Sent: 11.15 - 13/6

This is to the person that says Macs are immune to viruses. You're not, it's just that PC users think that they're already fucked up enough and there aren't any viruses out there that could do more damage to an already fucked up computer.

Name: I agree with The Ward
Sent: 11.21 - 13/6

The Ward has a good point. He has just single handedly changed my opinion of Macs. I don't hate Macs, I just prefer to use PCs. And as for all of you Mac users out there with a ram rod up your ass, loosten up, IT'S A JOKE!

Name: Macintrash
Sent: 12.04 - 13/6

One more thing about the viruses. I bet all the viruses for Windows were written by jealous Mac users with the purpose to ruin Bill Gates and Windows. (Fuck you Mac users)

Here we find a prime example in response to The Ward of someone with split personalities. Sadly, it seems to have been done to make it appear that The Ward had more support rather than for any other reason.

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 16.11 - 13/6

Hi All,

I just wanted to replay to two quick things others have mentioned.

First, some PC users are saying that the fact that Mac OS X is no big deal, and that you have been able to run UNIX on PCs for years. Well it is true that you have been able to use UNIX on a PC since forever and a day. But would you want to use it on your desktop computer to get your work done? Hells no! It would be some much more complicated and complex that you wouldn't know what to do with it. Even more complex than Windows. None of your software would work on it either, AND more than likely ALL of the programs you use on your PC would not run in a UNIX system, because the technology is totally different. So for all consumers out there that use there computers for home use or even business would never be able to use UNIX, until now. Apple OS X is pure UNIX with a beautiful and easy to use shell over it. Windows is DOS with a half assed shell over it that is no were near as stable. And for ease of use... the difference is amazing. You haven't experience a modern operating system until you open your apps from the user-friendly dock or browsed your files in 'columns' view in OS X. Its just such an easy, stable and beautiful thing. But what is the big deal with UNIX some ask? Well it is, without a doubt, the most STABLE AND POWERFUL operating system in the world. Bar-None.

Second point is the whole virus thing. Although there are some Mac viruses in existance, you more than likely will never experience one. Compared to the 10's if not 100's of thousands of virus for windows, there are probably a no more than a few hundred for the Mac. PC viruses don't affect Macs, and Mac virus don't affect PCs. Still with the numbers in my favor, I'm more than happy to stay with Mac. Where I work, a publishig company, there are two Macs and several PCs. I have had to clean viruses from every PC in the office. Yet the Macs chug away, error and virus free. The Macs are nearly 0% maintenance, unlike the PCs which I have to repair several times a month.

Just another two cents.


The great thing is that not only can we recognise the old propaganda, The Ward isn't even making a point here. Those of us who point out the whole UNIX core element are commenting on the fact that MacHeads whine about MS stealing all their best ideas, and at last Apple openly admits to using a core not of their own design. Sure it's stable, that's not in dispute, it's simply that Mac caved into using another design because they were not capable of creating their own stable O/S. As for virus's, I'll let you look through the guestbook for the answers to that issue.

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 16.19 - 13/6

Thank you 'I agree with The Ward', you just made my day. I'm glad someone actually thought about what I have said. :o)

Lesser would his revelling have been had he known it was someone with split personalities just trying to increase the numbers in Apples favour. The Wards later actions make us wonder though if he had not posted those comments himself from a different internet connection to his work or home.

Name: jackass
Sent: 11.21 - 14/6

Mr Ward,

One word:- "Linux". The whole internet is run from Linux based servers, not Mac OS X. Which is more stable?

Name: Brian Biggins
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 14.49 - 14/6

To The Ward.

I Love my mac so much and I think you know EVERYTHING about computers. I think I luurve you Mr. White-trash. Can we meet up and have more sex than your little ol' man-gina can take? I've got a 13 inch plug-in that would fit SO good in you, honey-buns. C'mon Baby...WHO'S YOUR DADDY!

Sweet lord, I want a peice of your ASS! Bend it this way baby, that's right!

Your not so distant lover, BRIAN!!

Name: Donald
Hometown: wouldnt you like to know
Sent: 14.58 - 14/6

I've been following "the ward"'s comments with somer interest. I would be most appreiciative if I could be enrolled in your unholy church of the sacreligios apple. Perhaps our friend , Brian could join as master of ceremonies, you know, toasting the virgin over melting PC's, that sort of thing. Then afterwards we can roll around cackling amongst the ashes, while brian butt-fucks you - obviously, and talk about how obvious it is that all PC users are inbred fools, because they have to have three mouse buttons and a dull single colour to their machines...er...and they have lots and lots of virus's too...so I read.

Take us oh leader to the place of wisdom that is your office, where the PC's crash and the the unused macs dont require any maintenance. I had a car I never used and that didn't need any maintenance either...funny that. I called it Apple.

Aaaaanyway! get back to me soon, me little cherrub! Let me know what you think about the church. Should it be high-church, evangellical, or perhaps just informal. I have some hymns prepaired if you'd like to conference about it...



Name: Chirrup
Hometown: Bingy Bungu
Sent: 06.44 - 15/6

So let me get this right...

I COULD buy a mac, and support a company who produce computers that have as many faults as other PC's, just in different ways. A company who make their own operating system. A company with a "think different" policy resulting in beautifully designed machines that are a bugger to upgrade...


I COULD buy a PC, supporting ANY company of my choice, with peripherals also from any company, suffer a beige / grey box, that is easily upgraded and is more compatible with the majority and allows me to do a greater variety of tasks. And have practically any OS of my choice.


And Mac people call PC people clones?

Clone with options, or Free Thinker with boundaries...hmmm

Hazy Friend

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 21.58 - 15/6

I think the sick fuck Adolf Sikelhuber says tons about the crap people believe about uneducated opions.
- possibly the only good thing The Ward said. "Adolf" infact linked to a KKK site - not posted here as it would be irresponsible to do so.

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 21.59 - 15/6

Oh boy you guys keep making my point. You can't say anything constructive. You should give it a try sometime.

First of all...Chirrup...Ahhh, yet another UNeducated person posting untrue information. Macs are actually EASIER to upgrade. Of course you would actually know this, if you saw and opened a Mac these days. Everyone I know, including a ton of PC techs love the PowerMac for its amazing ease of use and upgrade. For instance I installed another hard drive into a G4 yesterday. It took me less than 60 seconds. The side of the machine is on a hinge. Pull a little lever, down comes the side of the machine and everything is right there in front of you. No screws, no need to remove anything or push anything out of the way. No PC is such a beautiful piece of equiptment. A true thought out marvel that PC manufactures have yet to dublicate. After plugging the hard drive in I closed the side and turned on the machine. That was it. The hard drive mounted without any problems. I didn't have to install any software, drivers, etc. Software is the same way on the Mac, much easier than you actually know. You were simply stating more uneducated opinions like so many do. Do your homework first please. I look forward to an educated opion in the future.

Secondly...Jackass...I know what the internet is run off. I do know its Linux. Where did that comment come from? I'm a web designer, I know that linux runs the internet. I run two linux PC for my webservers. Linux is great, its never crashed in the 3 years I've been running the servers. We agree on this one.

Third...Brian Biggins...First of all no, I have a beautiful girlfriend that I love. So I'll have to turn you down. I am actually extremely educated in technology and I'm trying to make some points clear. With a completed college education and nearlly six figure income I'm pretty sure I'm not a white trash, uneducated individual like yourself. Oh and I'm only 24, not bad for the white trash that you think I am. I would type more for you, but you're not worth it. I think your comment speaks wonders about you.

Fourth..Donald...I'll have to pass on the church idea, maybe you and Brian can start without me. You and Brian continue to prove my point. More stupid, useless comments. I believes its because you honestly don't have anything constructive to say. But then again what do I know? I'm a silly Mac users. After you graduate high school come back and leave some constructive comments.

If anyone notices I don't leave useless drivel as comments. I try to make points. I don't say PCs are crap, I don't tell people not to use them. Still people get affended and threatened by my educated comments. Sad... so very said. Any your comments have that 'I'm still in hight school' feel. Grow up and get something constutive to say. But knowing the kind of people you are your next comments will be some useless drivel about wanted to butt fuck someone. Or starting some foolish church to butt fuck Brian. You sure are an interesting bunch. You are drawn to read my comments because I actually know what I'm talking about and it pisses you off that I make good points and the ONLY things you can come back with is crap.

I look forwar to hearing from more of my fans, or should I say non-fans?


It's most odd that someone professing to be so knowledgeable can't possibly accept that someone else is permitted to posses an opinion of their own. You will have noted, I'm sure, that anyone who disagrees with The Ward is branded as being uneducated. This is quite an accusation to make from someone not long out of university. The majority of his information, I am reliably informed, has emanated from the Apple site and Apple forums. So much for his education then! One other thing, it is most peculiar that EVERYONE, PC user or Mac user, claims to be able to refit their machine in 60 seconds. I'm beginning to believe this is just something people say to get attention. Please note again, The Ward attempts to protest at the maturity of the other guestbook dwellers.

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 22.14 - 15/6

Hey Adolf Sikelhuber, you are a sick fuck. Since I just turned down Brian Biggins maybe you can try to get a HOLD of him so you guys can HOOK up.

Name: The Chicken
Sent: 00.05 - 16/6


Larry, you're trying way too hard. WAAAAAAY too hard!

Name: The Chicken
Sent: 00.08 - 16/6

And another thing, your grammar is all over the place. If you're trying to impress us all with your college education you're falling at the first hurdle.

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 00.10 - 16/6

Hey Adolf Sikelhuber, you are a sick fuck. Since I just turned down Brian Biggins maybe you can try to get a HOLD of him so you guys can HOOK up.

No, this is not my error. For some reason The Ward couldn't drop this and had to post it again 1 hour and 56 minutes later. ?!?

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 00.15 - 16/6

Mr. Chicken,

I'm not trying to impress anyone. I'm just trying to dispell rumors about Macs. But like every other high school child in here you look past my points. So what if I have typos, it does not mean that I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm trying to educated people that refuse to listen and that act childish. I come back here to response to you guys and gals for the amusement, not to type correctly. You guys make my day in all honesty, because I know what you don't.

Me Again

Truly a man with his head up his own arse. Maturity is The Wards middle name! Can't you tell by the pleasure he gets because "You guys make my day in all honesty, because I know what you don't."

Name: Agreed
Hometown: Cali
Sent: 00.21 - 16/6

I agree that 'Ward' makes good points. He has sparked interest in me to learn more about Apple although I love my PC as well.


I'm sure that the ward was very proud to read that comment. To know that someone deeply appreciates your efforts to "educate" people, it must truly be grand! Such a shame it is then that "Agreed" is the same person as "The Ward". Mature? Not very! Desperate? Definitely!

Name: Chicken
Sent: 00.27 - 16/6

Ward, have you been copying and pasting again? Your same comment appeared twice, separated by two hours... What the heck??!

Is it a Mac thing? ;)

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 00.30 - 16/6

Hmmm... I'm not sure what has happened. I've seen a couple people post appear twice. And no, its not a mac thing. ;o)

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 00.31 - 16/6

Oh and I haven't copy and pasted here before. FYI

Name: Chicken
Sent: 00.39 - 16/6

Okay, well FYI I'm tired and I'm going to go to bed now. You're more than welcome to sit there refreshing the page though

Name: Pixel Pete
Hometown: NOR CAl Baby!
Sent: 00.41 - 16/6

This upgarde crap has got to go.IE crashing is a Bunch of crap also. I agree with Ward. Your parents are to cheap to buy a good machine.
Fry the Chicken!!

Sent: 00.44 - 16/6


Yes, that was The Ward.


Name: Pete Again
Hometown: Westsiade!
Sent: 00.57 - 16/6

O.K. Here's a test, you'll need to set up a proper testing environment. First, go into your drawer and get a number 2 pencil. Ah-HA! See that was a trick question- only PC users have things like #2 pencils. That's because their therapists are constantly making them take written personality test to prove their self-worth, which incidentally, they generally fail, or they'd be Mac users in the first place.

Sent: 01.01 - 16/6


Yes, him again!

Name: Pixel Petey
Hometown: Your MAMA!
Sent: 01.35 - 16/6

Here's another one!
Next time you're strolling the CompUSA aisles, take a look @ their PC laptops. You'll notice that almost every laptop has a trackpad, rather than a trackball or mouse. That's Apple technology. Apple was the company that introduced the trackpad to laptop computing and now it's the standard for both PCs and Macs.
While your there, slide on down to the section where they have the desktop PC's. CD-ROM drives are standard on about every machine, right? Have been for year's, right? That's because Apple changed the industry by being the first to introduce a personal computer with a built-in CD-ROM Drive.
First to have the balls to get ride of floppy drives. It's 2002 people, we move forward, let it go! First to offer built-in networking, also wireless local networking( plus built in dual antennas. First computers to offer built-in sound, something that is standard in todays PCs; but until just a few years ago. How much was that sound card you bought?
PDA first, screwless latch case design, Do away with internal fans, USB standard on all machines, and our final gift to PC users firewire. Must stop typing more innovative stuff getting tired of ..........You!

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 01.48 - 16/6

Now Pixel Petey knows what he's talking about. Apple is THE computer innovator. Because of this they will always be around and always pushing the market forward.

Sing it brother!

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 01.57 - 16/6

Now Pixel Petey knows what he's talking about. Apple is THE computer innovator. Because of this they will always be around and always pushing the market forward.

Sing it brother!

Get the feeling you're being ministered to? I Think "Donald" was right! And yes, again The Ward posts comments 9 minutes apart!

Name: marchaos
Hometown: Bremen, Germany
Sent: 12.20 - 16/6

Hey people, I'm working on Windows and Mac Systems, and sometimes using Silicon Graphic or Sun Workstations under Unix and at home I make experiments with Linux. Its all the same crap, computers are the most powerful but also inperfects tools man ever made. I laughed about the Chickens iToilet and translated it to German (http://www.marchaos.org/fun/iToilet.html) But I would lough too, if he releases a satirical article about Windows or Linux. Have a nice time, marchaos

Name: marchaos
Hometown: Bremen, Germany
Sent: 12.28 - 16/6

Ey Mister Ward, you wrote: "Yes Macs are more expensive, but isn't a Mercedes more expensive than a Kia?" It's a good statement. I am driving a mercedes and work with windows. Yeah, I would like own a G4 like I'm working with at business, but everyone must know for himself. Think!

Name: Chicken
Sent: 13.32 - 16/6

HAHAHAHAHA! I'm so glad you brought up the fact that Apple introduced the trackpad to laptop computing.

I didn't know it was Apple who was responsible, but it's good to be able to blame someone. Why just the other day I was reading a lovely little article called "Computing Injuries due to ASD (Amazingly Stupid Designs)".

Er? Amazingly stupid designs? From Apple. You must be joking. But the trackpad is one example where the PC industry should have avoided copying Apple's "designs" like the plague. That little trackpad causes untold wrist injury. I'm sure Apple fans would love to shake the hand of the designer but their wrist muscles have no doubt gone limp from using that damn trackpad (or from doing too much of something else?)

Same goes for computer mice in general. They're horrible little things. And once again Apple wins the prize for worst mouse deign, ie the "pebble" mouse included with the first iMac. A classic example of where Apple put form over function. How stupid do you have to be not to realise that a round mouse that could only be suitable for a small child's hand is a very very bad idea? Oh, but it looks cute.

That's alright then.

By the way, the article I was referring to can be found here: http://www.the-office.com/ASDawards.htm

Scroll to the bottom to read about those wonderful trackpads we're all thanking Apple for.

Sent: 19.03 - 16/6


I happen to prefer the trackpad over other mouse technologies in laptops today. I find it much more precise and easy to control. What is your next comeback going to be? Are you going to blame whoever invented the keyboard for a stupid design that causes carpals tunnel? Think before you write.

I was hoping that someone would write something constructive that the PC market has done for the world of computing. Yet, I still sit here and wait.


Just in case it had slipped anyone's notice, The Ward professed to be mature and educated. Yet he cant seem to grasp the rather simple points people are making and instead diverts the attention to his own 'brilliance'.

Name: The Ward
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Sent: 19.03 - 16/6

Oh Chicken, the last comment was mine. Simply forgot to put my name on it.

Name: Chicken
Sent: 19.22 - 16/6

I'm I'm I'm not stupid...

Your name's not necessary Ward, your IP number is sufficient...

Name: Chicken
Sent: 19.49 - 16/6

Oh, and Ward, here's the IP number you use from work:

Do they pay you that six figure salary you were boasting about to waste time on silly web-sites??

And here ends The Wards contributions to the guestbook. Why were there no more? Why did the Electric Chicken post his IP numbers?

The Ward in all his wisdom and maturity decided to flood three pages of the guestbook with entries that simply read:


When the Chicken saw this, he quickly deleted the pointless entries and awaited the next comment from The Ward.

Apart from the fact that your IP number is a useful little key to anyone wishing to infiltrate your computer (particularly bad if you connect from work), in the hands of someone able to access the necessary records, it will pin point your location by your subscription to your server. Also, due to the frankly annoying and immature nature of the contributions provided by The Ward, Electric Chicken blocked his IP numbers so he could no longer post.

Let this be a lesson to all who would be a pain in the arse. You would surely need to be as entertaining as "The Ward" to be honoured in this hall of fame, but at the cost of shaming Mac users everywhere. Pixel Pete became known as The Ward's 'yes-man' and continued to post comments. But he hasn't been nearly as fun!



What has The Ward taught us about Macs and their users? Whilst The Ward had facts at his disposal, much of it was propaganda taken from Apple Fanatics sites and forums. There was some valuable data in there, I'm sure, but it would take a lot of weeding out.

On Mac users: if The Ward is anything to judge by, then Mac users are self obsessed, arrogant, in need of self reassurance, immature, pompous... well you can draw many more descriptives I'm sure.

HOWEVER! The fact of the matter is that Mac USERS are not like The Ward. There have been many comments in the guestbook from well rounded individuals who choose to use Apple Macs, yet still can see the humour in the iToilet. It is this unfortunate majority in the Mac community that seem to have an emotional attachment to their computer and feel terribly affronted that someone might joke about their beloved machines. These are the MacHeads, or Mac Addicts. I'm afraid The Ward was one such person.

So thanks to The Ward, the belief that Mac users are elitist and blind has been reinforced for another day!


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